The Bodacious Belgrade Blog

March 12, 2009

Satanic Worship And Your Child

Filed under: Uncategorized — bunitingi @ 2:44 pm

When one has a new, spunky little cherub, one finds oneself sometimes surmising wistfully on all the rites of passage you’ll one day watch him pass through which you yourself once experienced. Learning to drive, going to an amusement park, having a blanky (he has this new little bear blanky that he taken too with great gusto), all these great things.

And of course, one can at this stage only imagine how one day when he’s a teenager, he will worship Satan for himself.

I worshiped Satan as a teen as did almost all my friends. The vast majority of teenagers do in one form or another (except in Texas where they just have anal sex and call themselves virgins), although the methods change from generation to generation. I’m sure he will bow before His Dark Blasphemousness in ways my generation had never thought of, although i would like to think that maybe we’ll have passed the torch just a little.

In my day we worshiped Satan in a number of ways, but the way in which i was most involved was by playing Dungeons & Dragons. We used to spend countless nights in small groups, huddled around a table with our thinly veiled occult supplies, die of twisted shapes which no devout mind would have ever dreamed of molding, papers, pencils, and modules allowing our collective imaginations to go to infernal realms where “imaginary” monsters (i.e. Demons) would assault our “characters”. Great times.

Of course we weren’t fooling everybody. Some do gooder parents, unblinded by our pretenses of “it’s just a harmless games of creativity and imagination” clearly saw the demonic dangers, (curse them!), and raised a holy tirade against this rather obvious form of Satanic brainwashing (and not just Jack Chick, although he always was the most insightful). But they could not stop us. Play D&D we did, as one by one our souls and minds were corrupted, leaving us hollow shells, as evidenced by the classic documentary featuring a very young and unknown Tom Hanks, ‘Mazes & Monsters’. (i did actually watch it back in the day.)

The Tools Of The Occult

But lest my generation get cocky and think we had invented the Art of Teenage Satanic Worship, we were only carrying on the proud mantle bestowed on us by OUR parents. After all, they were the generation who invented Rock & Roll. Nice one Mom and Dad. Definite kudos for that bit.

But we weren’t slouches either. D&D wasn’t our only form of Demonic Subservience. I would urge you all not to forget that it was my generation who invented Goth. That’s right, The Cure, Sisters Of Mercy anyone? We totally invented Goth, which i note with great satisfaction is still around today, stronger then ever. Go acne faced Minions of Darkness!

I watched in the 90s as a new generation of eager Disciples explored variations of D&D and Goth. Vampire the roll playing game and from that Larping got HUGE in the mid 90s. (Larping is when a large group of people play the Vampire Role Playing game in a live setting, acting out their characters and situations instead of simply sitting around a table. I attending a couple although never formally participated. It’s, uh… it’s kinda interesting. I appreciate the improvisational theatrical aspect of it.) I told you Mazes & Monsters was a Prophecy.

And from those fine little suckling minions of Satan’s teats Vampires in general has continued it’s popularity today. It’s a veritable fashion statement these days, much to the horror of those in the moral majority who clearly saw this teenage identity exploration for what it really is. (And Jack Chick. Again! And probably Hannity.)

Many decried emo as the new satanic ploy, but really, emo is like Goth for pussies. It might have some gateway potential, but it’s just not Nefernal enough. Still there can sometimes be Cutting involved so maybe it has more potential than i give it credit for. (Heaven forbid troubled teenage behavior ever be put down to the fact that they’re… uh, troubled. Humanist liberals always fall for that explanation.)

Yes, teenagers will always find new, fun ways to damn themselves. But of course, in this new age, we have probably the greatest champion of Satanic brainwashing who has ever risen from the depth of Hell and assumed human form. This odious woman has taken the notion of teenage Satanic worship and boldy dared claim that we need not wait until adolescence, we can begin formulating the principles of Demonic Masochism as children!

I speak of course of the greatest Demonologist who has ever lived, the terrible, the great and the eternally damned J.K.Rowling. How many innocent young souls has she won for The Dark Side? It cannot be counted. Yes this last generation has a worthy new champion defending the bowels of Hell.

But one day my little cherub will be ready to engage in terrible and corrupting teenage pursuits. Harry Potter will be old news by then. Vampires will probably have receded although i predict Goth will continue to be around as it seems to have staying power. Rock and Roll isn’t quite as shocking as it once was, heavy metal is mostly silly, D&D barely comes up anymore. What new and exciting activities will his generation embark upon that will get the upright among us into a screaming tizzy?

I can only imagine, but i assure you, i will quite enjoy being there to watch.

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1 Comment »

  1. Of course, for those Alex Keaton kids who wish to alarm their hippie parents, there’s always the form of Satan worship known as the Republican Party.

    Comment by matthew — March 13, 2009 @ 10:01 pm | Reply


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