The Bodacious Belgrade Blog

March 27, 2009

Pics Tomorrow

Filed under: Uncategorized — bunitingi @ 1:10 am

Didn’t forget about y’all. Got new pics comin’ tomorrow.

Funny, despite all my bitching and moaning during the first 2 months, maja and i were talking the other day, and we both agreed that now, at 4 months old, we REALLY like him just as he is, and we would be content for him to stay like this for awhile longer.

He’s so interactive, so smiley faced, so small and holdable still, but so sometimes AWARE and present, so happy to see us, so innocent, so beautiful, so… nuggetlike… so big but sometimes so tiny. This stage he’s at is really endearing and wonderful and i could have him stay like this just a bit longer.

Especially if he could learn to fall asleep on his own. Although his appetite is WAY up, and he sleeps longer at night in between feedings. We lost a feeding somewhere in the past week or so (YAY!).

Yeah, i really like the way he is now. Sigh.

Anyway, pics tomorrow, promise.

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March 24, 2009

Ferdinand Cheval: Eccentric Nut Or Visionary Genius?

Filed under: Uncategorized — bunitingi @ 10:09 pm

Clearly i have a thing for guys who spend their life toiling away at their artistic dream, unrewarded but for the sake of the craft itself. I wonder why.

So, in southern France,  in the village of Hauterives back in 1879, there lived this postman named Ferdinand Cheval. His mail route was 32 kilometers, which he would walk every day, day in day out, delivering the mail. One day he tripped over a rock. He picked up the rock, looked at it, and thought it was just amazing. It reminded him of dreams of castles and palaces he used to have years earlier. He took the rock home with him.

From then on he started collecting rocks. Every day he would pick up more and more rocks and bring them home. After a while he would pile rocks he found at spots along his route and then come back at night to collect them. Eventually he scraped money together and bought a wheelbarrow, which became his most prized possession (he was buried with it), and with which he could cart home even MORE rocks. Piles of these rocks littered his yard.

His neighbors in the village thought he was a nutbag. One day he took his rock collection and began building with them. When asked what he was building, he declared “a palace.”

Now his neighbors were convinced he was nuts and would refer to him as the village idiot on occasion.

Ferdinand spent the next 33 years collecting rocks and building his Palace.

THIS is what he built:

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Seriously.

This thing RULES. As of today this man is my new hero.

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He wrote inscriptions all over it. One in the northeast corner says : “10,000 days, 93,000 hours, 33 years of toil”

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All can perhaps hope is that one day, after my death, some shmoe with a blog will pose the question: Paul Shapera, Musical Awesomeness or Total Wanker? And perhaps, will decide for the former.

Naturally, after his DEATH (as is the artist’s fate) in 1924 he was finally given his props and in 1969 the French government declared the palace, called Le Palais Ideal, a historic landmark.

Never the less, Ferdinand Cheval, you sir, rule. My hats off to you. I can only hope to follow in your footsteps.

ferdinand-cheval

March 22, 2009

The UTI That Cried Wolf

Filed under: Uncategorized — bunitingi @ 5:39 pm

So, uh…. we got the lab results back this morning when we took him to the hospital for his daily dose of antibiotics.

He, uh… he doesn’t have a Urinary Tract Infection. He probably never did. He’s fine.

Of course now that he’s ON antibiotics he has to STAY on antibiotics on the chance that he DID have some sort of bacterial infection. IF he did, stopping the antibiotics would be disastrous, and you know, what the hell. Why stop the party now?

So what happened? What the F*** is going on?

Sigh.

Basically, several days ago Maja woke up and discovered the baby was REALLY hot. She took his temperature and sure enough he had a fever. There were no other symptoms of sickness. What to do?

So she wanted to take him to the health clinic to get him checked out. ‘Cause, well, he’s 4 months old and has a fever. We don’t know that else to do in these circumstances. I brushed it off and didn’t think it was a big deal.

I want to say for the record, that while this turned out to be the case, i do not trumpet my nonchalance as the way to go and that she should listen to me from here on out. The fact is, i tend to be more nonchalant about these things and to assume they’re probably not a big deal. Maja takes the other approach. BOTH of these approaches TOGETHER work to his benefit. I am the one who doesn’t stress out and keeps her calm, and she is the one who sides on “better safe than sorry”. I don’t think she should be more like me and i am me and am not going to be more like her. Together these approaches make for a good parenting team. And sometimes i probably need to occasionally take some stuff more seriously and sometimes she needs to relax and take them less. This isn’t the point of my post today but i wanted it stated for the record.

We took him to the Health Clinic. They said the thing it was most likely to be was a UTI and needed a blood sample and a urine test.

I still don’t know what ever happened with that first blood sample. I’ll have to ask.

The urine test is where it all got screwy.

We needed to have him pee in a bag AND in a cup. The pee in the cup had to be NOT the first burst of pee, which was most likely contaminated, but the second half  which would be LESS contaminated. As we did all this and ran around to all the various places they tell you to run around TO, Maja got in touch with a friend of her brother’s who works in a hospital who could get us in to see aNOTher doctor, a specialist or something, that very evening.

Off we went to the hospital. Meanwhile, the first round of pee tests were coming back full of bacteria. While it could be contaminated, they were also full of proteins and white blood cells and stuff they said certainly pointing to a UTI.

In the hospital we had aNOTHER round of blood taking and peeing into a bag. They sent us home to pee into aNOTHER cup.

At home we were sitting holding the cup under his little willy AGAIN, waiting and waiting for him to pee when we got a call: come BACK to the hospital NOW, (it was night by now) , some tests are in.

Well, the tests seem to indicate there are lots of bacteria, my what an amazing amount of bacteria and while the only way we will know for SURE is to stick the that damned catheter in his willy and get a truly uncontaminated specimen, it’s looking pretty hard core. The bacteria is resistant to every antibiotic they have exCEPT the one that has a risk for hearing damage. ( in large amount and over a long time). We had best stick the catheter in, start him on the treatment and on sunday we will know for sure just how bad he’s got it.

So now it’s sunday, we went in for his daily dose and to see the doc about the results. And the results are negative. No bloody UTI.

It’s POSsible he had something and the antibiotics we gave that first day wiped it. Not really likely, but hey. It’s possible. There was definitely SOMEthing wrong with him that had caused that fever, but it could’ve been anything, like a virus.

Who knows. We’ll never know. A lot of hoopla over nothing. Lots of hoopla, lots of nothing. He’s still gotta take those antibiotics though, cause once you start, you gotta go the distance.

It’s hard to know what to do in these situations. What should we have done? Do nothing? I wouldv’e done that, but one of these days i’m gonna recommend that and it’s not going to be nothing.  how do you really know which? You have the internet, but self diagnosing over the net is actually NOT a great thing. LEARNING about what the problem is once you’re sure there’s a problem, the net is GREAT for that.

(“Omg,what wrong with him? Here, let me google his symptoms…. fever…. sweaty feet…. yeah he cried last night… didn’t poop in the last 3 hours… AAAAHHHHHH!!!!! OMG he has Beubonic Typhoid Urinasitice!!!!!!!” MY BABY!!!)

So there’s a lesson in here somewhere.

Don’t ever trust pee that was in a bag. That much i can tell you.

March 20, 2009

Jim Henson Chicken Soup For The Soul

Filed under: Uncategorized — bunitingi @ 9:23 pm

Little guy is okay.

He’s got his little tube sticking out of his hand so that they can give him his shot every morning when we take him in. He woke up this morning happy as a clam and probably doesn’t remember the entire catheter experience that has his Dad still twitching in horror.

In any case, i’m going to have a little wind down with some Jim Henson’s Muppets more melancholy moments.

And from Jim Henson’s Funeral:

Kill Bill In 60 Seconds

Filed under: Uncategorized — bunitingi @ 8:50 pm

Awesomeness.

UTI

Filed under: Uncategorized — bunitingi @ 12:32 am

They put a catheter in his little pee-pee today.

The entire day… he has a urinary tract infection. He’s peed in bags, into cups… we’ve SAT there for an hour holding cups under his little pee-pee waiting for him to pee for 2 days now. They’ve taken blood from his little finger, much more from his little arm, (he was not happy about that), done analysis, they need to check out his kidneys… they’ve told us the bacteria is some super resistant strain. No antibiotic will work except this kind that has a risk for hearing loss…

Through it all i’ve been nonchalant. Maja’s worried and scared like any poor, new momma would be, but i’ve told her not to worry. It’ll be fine. We need to go to some other health clinic, some other hospital for some other thing they’re sending us to now, okay, no problem. Don’t woooorrrry. It will be fine. It’s just a thing. We’ll deal with it and that will be that.

But then they said they had to put a catheter in his pee-pee. (anOTHER urine analysis. This one from the source)

That’s when i lost it.

Catheters. Is there any word that strikes more fear into the heart of a man?

The moment you even beGIN to think of it, you cringe and all but double over. There is nothing more evil of cruel in all the world.

Now it was maja’s turn to tell me not to worry, it’ll be okay, everything will be alright. I told her i can do anything else, but i canNOT be in the room when they do it. (which was fine since they don’t let the parents int the room when they do it anyway.)

A pox on the son of a bitch who first thought of the unholy, blasphemous catheter.

There. I got it out. We shall never speak of this again.

March 18, 2009

Urinary Tract Infection

Filed under: Uncategorized — bunitingi @ 9:19 pm

So it looks like Adam has one. We’ll know the full story tomorrow. Uncircumcised boys run a higher risk. (i have wanted him circumcised since day 1 and it’s starting to piss me off.)

He’ll need antibiotics. We’re all set with everything to give him, we just need the final word tomorrow afternoon. The poor little guy is running a temperature that comes and goes, although he’s not sick in any other way, so he’s in still in a pretty good mood.

I went out for St. Patrick’s Day last night, to a real Irish Pub here in Belgrade where they serve Guinness from the tap (only 8$ a pint…) So on the positive side i had the first decent beer i’ve had since coming here a year ago today. On the down side, the place was PACKED, i mean SLAM PACKED with music at horRENdous levels (although once the band started the volume actually went down).

The trouble with never going out, like, EVER, is that one is SO not used to being in a slam packed bar where you can’t move, walk or talk. I’m out of practice and it was a bit overwhelming. My buddy commenting i’m getting old, and touche, however, i have always hated overpacked places and esPECIALLY music that is way too loud even back when i was 21, so there you go. I would go back to grab a pint, though. Guinness. At last. A REAL bloody beer.

Gd i miss Sam Adams.

I’m not overly worried about the baby, maja is doing enough of that for the both of us. I think he’ll be fine, just thank goodness we caught this quickly. (Maja noticed he had a very high temperature 2 mornings ago.)

And there’s your Belgrade news for today. We’ll keep it short and sweet.

Caio.

March 17, 2009

Happy St. Patrick’s Day!

Filed under: Uncategorized — bunitingi @ 3:32 am

I can’t possibly offer anything better than this piece of classicness:

Really, really good commercial

Filed under: Uncategorized — bunitingi @ 1:10 am
Tags:

Seriously, for anyone who hasn’t seen it yet, this is totally worth 45 seconds of your day:

March 16, 2009

The Tale Of How

Filed under: Uncategorized — bunitingi @ 4:41 pm

A gorgeous piece of animation, just gorgeous:

Vodpod videos no longer available.

Made by a collective known as the Blackheart Gang, their website can be found here.

Little Steelers Fan

Filed under: Uncategorized — bunitingi @ 12:57 am

Dear Paul,

“Satan Worship And Your Child”…. “Gay Harry Potter Porn”…. Jesus, could you just, like, have a nice post where you show cute baby pictures?

Love,

Your Relatives.

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Dear Relatives,

Here you go.

Love,

Paul.

P.S. the red marks on his face in the last few photos are from the damn mosquitoes.

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Touchdown!

March 14, 2009

Gay Harry Potter Porn

Filed under: Uncategorized — bunitingi @ 5:43 pm
Tags: ,

98% of my regular blog readership will want to skip this post. Seriously. You really, REALLY want to skip this one.

A couple of you will be foolish enough to keep reading, and if your name is Jaimee and you’re a lawyer living in DC, this will probably be your favorite post EVER.

When i check my blog statistics i get to see all the search terms that lead the non regulars to the blog. And there is one search term that conSIStently pops up, day after day, whether i blog every day or take a month off. And that search term is “Gay Harry Potter”.

I get more hits for Gay Harry Potter than for anything else.

I’ve only mentioned Harry Potter a few times, and i’ve mentioned Gayity a few times, almost never together (although there’s that one pic from the Banned Book post, another very highly populated post), and yet in they pour, to what has become essentially a never ending baby blog, looking for Gay Harry Potter.

After watching this happen day after day, i can’t help but conclude that there is a desperate need on the net for more Gay Harry Potter. So as a service to the masses, for all those who come here seeking some gay Harry Potter porn and finding only stupid baby stories, this post is for you. I am taking the trouble to write a script for a Gay Harry Potter porno. I must warn you, though, if you’ve come here just for gay harry potter, you really, really will not like anything else on this blog. And for those of you who like everything else on the blog, you really, really will not like this:

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Harry Potter And The Sorcerer’s Bone.

(Scene: A train station. Harry and his adopted family are standing outside a train.)

Mr. Dursley: Good riddance you little shit!

Harry: Sod off you fat wanker!

(Scene, inside train compartment. Harry enter car where Ron is sitting alone. Both look frightened.)

Harry: Uhm, is this compartment taken?

Ron: No, you can sit here if you like. My name’s Ron.

Harry: Thanks Ron. I’m Harry. (Harry sits. Ron sniffles)

Harry: What’s wrong?

Ron: I’m just so nervous. I’ve never been away from home before.

Harry: It’s okay, Ron. We’ll look out for each other. (Puts his arm around Ron.)

(Malfoy sticks his head in the compartment)

Malfoy: What’s this? Two little scared babies?

Ron: Shut up, Malfoy!

Malfoy: You’re poor and you’re mom’s a crackwhore!

Harry: Go away, you tosser!

Malfoy: You wish you could toss me! (Goes away.)

Harry: Don’t listen to him, Ron. I’m sure your mom has her reasons.

Ron: Thanks, Harry. You’re a good friend. (they inch closer.)

Harry: So what do we do all trip?

Ron: We could play a game. Have you ever played Wands?

Harry: No. I just got mine.

Ron: Not that wand, silly.

Harry: Than what wand? I only have this phoenix wand.

Ron: Your OTHER wand, Harry. Here, i’ll show you how to play.

(Ron unzips Harry’s pants. Cue music- Herbie Hancock: Chameleon.

Gay sex ensues.)

Scene 2

(Hermione enters the dorm floor at Hogwarts. Lots of girls are sitting around in their robes and nighties.)

Hermione: Well, hello. I’m hear to find where to put my stuff and bed down.

Random Girl: You can’t stay here until you’ve passed the initiation!

Hermione: That’s ridiculous! This is a socialist democracy. Free housing is given all based on equal…

Other Girl: Look bookworm, in here housing is given to all those who pass the initiation.

Hermione: What’s the initiation?

Random Girl: You must please us. All of us.

Hermione: Please you? How?

(Cue music- Enya: Any damn song. They’re all the same.

Massive lesbian orgy ensues.)

Scene 3

(Harry and Ron are wandering the forest at night.)

Ron: I don’t like this, Harry. Why are we here again?

Harry: Because Voldermort is trying to take over my mind.

Ron: How do you know this?

Harry: Because he makes me think of stuff. Terrible stuff.

Ron: What kind of stuff?

Harry: Stuff involving…. (he shudders. In a quiet voice) lots of…. penises.

Ron: Sounds pretty gay to me.

Harry: I’m NOT GAY! I’m NOT! I HATE queers! Hate them! It’s not me! It’s Voldermort!

Ron: You’re a nutter.

(Large Centaur appears)

Centaur: Halt! What are you doing in my forest?

Harry: Ah!

Ron: Jesus! He’s hung like a horse!

Centaur: Well it would stand to reason.

Harry: No Ron, i won’t look. I won’t!

Centaur: What are two young, nubile little twinks doing out in the woods so late? You are not allowed here. We normally treat trespassers roughly. But for you two, perhaps if you pay the toll i can be persuaded to let you pass.

Ron: What toll?

Centaur: The pole toll.

Harry: Oh no! I can feel Voldermort trying to influence my mind!

Centaur: Bend over, boys.

(Cue music-  I Want A Hip Hop Horse.

Gay transpecies sex ensues.)

Scene 4

(Inside of Hagrid’s cottage.Night. He is downing the better half of a bottle of Scotch.)

Hagrid: Bloody hell I’m sauced!

Dragon: Rawk!

Hagrid: Ah, and i’ve got me a mighty itch that needs scratched.

Dragon: Rawk!

Hagrid: That’s right, get over here, Dragon!

Dragon: Raaaaaaawk!

(Cue music- Manowar: Ride The Dragon

Gay, very wrong, cross species sex ensues.)

Scene 5

(Snape’s classroom, after class. Snape is lecturing Harry and Neville)

Snape: You two are worthless. Your grades in my class are below acceptable and i will be delighted when the two of you flunk out.

Neville: No!

Harry: No!

Neville: I can’t flunk out, i can’t! Please Professor Snape, there must be SOMEthing we can do to raise our grades!

Snape: Hmm…

Harry: Ah! Voldermort, he’s coming! He’s coming!

Snape: No he’s not, but if you want to stay at Hogwart’s, I had better be.

(Cue music- Van Halen: Hot For Teacher

Gay sex ensues.)

(At some point late in scene there is a sudden flash of smoke. Dobby appears.)

Dobby: No! Leave good Harry alone you must! Dobby will not let harm come to Harry!

Neville: Is that Yoda?

Harry: No, it’s Dobby the house elf.

Snape: Quiet, Elf! I will have my way with th…..

(Dobby casts spell on Snape and freezes him. Since we have no budget we suggest actor suddenly stands very still.)

Dobby: Run, Harry!

(The three of them run out of the classroom and down into the kitchen where the various house elves are preparing dinner.)

Dobby: Safe here we will be, Harry.

Neville: I’m telling you, he talks exactly like Yoda. And only mildly more attractive.

Harry: Thank you so much, Dobby. You saved us. We’re so grateful.

Neville: Yeah, thanks.

Dobby: All Dobby wants, all any house elf wants is to please his master.

(Other elves nod in agreement.)

Dobby: Please Harry, can… can Dobby….. please you?

Harry: Uh oh, Voldermort is rising.

Dobby: Maybe Dobby can make Voldermort go away again.

Harry: Please Dobby, take care of Voldermort.

(Cue music- uh… absolutely no idea. Gay elf orgy with Harry and Neville ensues. Do they make songs for occasions like these?)

Scene 6

(Hogwart living area. Harry’s backing is turned and a slapping sound can be heard)

Harry: Down Voldermort! Get down you bald bastard!

(Malfoy walks in.)

Malfoy: Well if it isn’t Potter the little twink.

Harry: I’m not a twink!

Malfoy: You are so gay, Potter.

Harry: I’m NOT! I HATE queers! It’s Voldermort, it’s all Voldermort!

Malfoy: Voldermort is just your penis, Harry.

Harry: No, he’s another person who makes me think bad things!

Malfoy: I’ve had enough of you. I’m going to kick your ass, Potter.

Harry: Bring it you Wagnerian wank bucket.

(Harry and Malfoy have wizards duel. Due to limited budget they just pull out light sabers and bang the shit out of each other.

Draco loses. He lays on the floor as Harry stands over him.)

Harry: See what you’ve done, Draco! Now Voldermort has risen!

Malfoy: You are a fucking nutter, Potter.

Harry: Shut up Draco! I’m tired of your big mouth. I know how to shut you up. You just need something stuffed in it!

(Cue music- Billy Squier: Stroke Me.

Needless to say, gay sex ensues.

Afterwards they lay together.)

Harry: Oh Draco, you’re the only one who has ever been able to tame Lord Voldermort.

Malfoy: You’re right, Harry, Voldermort sure is one mighty bugger.

(They kiss. Cue music: Air Supply: I’m All Out Of Love.

harrypottergay

Credits.)

…………………………………………………………..

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